A criminal enterprise run by monkeys
28 comments
·July 30, 2025decimalenough
I saw the title, got ready to post about my own criminal monkey misadventures, and realized it's the same place (Uluwatu Temple). However, the story underplays an important element: it's actually a triangular syndicate of crime, and humans are very much part of the picture.
First, the monkey steals something of value from a tourist and (the missing bit) they run inside the temple buildings, which are off-limits to tourists.
Second, a friendly temple priest or caretaker (the mentioned "monkey handlers"), who is allowed inside, fences the loot by exchanging it for something a monkey values, like a tasty banana.
Third, the relieved tourist gets their belongings back and generously tips the caretaker.
micah94
Do you think WSJ is doing this deliberately? Leaving out the part about how it's actually humans behind it. I've heard of this a long time ago, but I see this is a new story. Probably a hundred generations of monkeys have learned this behavior and they don't need any training or handling at this point!
llbbdd
It would not surprise me if WSJ leave this out to avoid painting white tourists as victims.
decimalenough
Or brown locals as complicit.
saghm
Ah yes, the infamously woke Wall Street Journal, bastion of leftwing propaganda since time immemorial.
OutOfHere
As noted in the comments of the WSJ article, the monkeys have allegedly been trained by their human handlers to engage in this behavior. It is to promote the sales of the local food vendors at all costs. It is a criminal enterprise, but the criminals are still humans.
bediger4000
There need to be swift, severe penalties for these generational crime families. They can't speak, all they understand is violence and ransom, so we must "speak" the only language that they also understand.
ChosenEnd
Give orange me give eat orange me eat orange give me eat orange give me you.
saghm
It's about time we stop supplying them with sources of dietary fiber and force them to cultivate some moral fiber instead.
dennis_jeeves2
Under section 3.5.6.dx of the primate penal code.
m463
As an outraged banana plutocrat, I wholeheartedly agree!
refulgentis
Haha based!!
quantified
Don't forget how closely related we are. Not as close as to the murderous bastards known as chimpanzees, but close enough.
thmryth
I thought it was going to be about Sony, Bethesda, or a credit card company.
econ
I wonder if they can serve drinks.
Deliver packages?
c22
Sure, why not?
Monkey helpers are trained to assist with tasks such as:
Retrieving dropped objects such as cell phones or remote controls
Opening bottles and inserting straws
Turning on buttons/switches for remotes, phones, and computers
Repositioning limbs on a wheelchair after a muscle spasm to prevent sores and other injuries
Turning pages and scratching itches
Detrytus
Reminds me of my visit on Gibraltar: monkeys jumping on cars, or stealing purses
hatthew
> A photograph taken by one of the thieves themselves.
uh oh
damontal
Right! You’re talking shit! PLAY A RECORD!
windowsworkstoo
The amount of ideas Karl had that have since come to fruition is quite remarkable
naikrovek
I get that reference. And I applaud it.
“oooOOOhhh, chimpanzee that! Monkey News, ya fff…”
mathattack
duskwuff
Mind that the original article has some videos which aren't archived.
Gift link: https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/monkeys-thieves-bali-temple-0b...